Despondent
by LittleSunset264
Summary: Della's unable to sleep at night. Thinking about stuff isn't helping her much, either. (One-shot.)


She looked out the window.

It looked as bleak as always, looking at the night sky. Stars were all around in the sky, everywhere one would look. Not a single spot in the sky wasn't there a star. It was a real dark blue, so dark it could be mistaken for black instead of blue.

Nothing new or exciting to observe from out the window, though, so she turned away.

It was the same thing every time. Look at him, go crazy on the inside, wanting to say something about it, but never actually spit it out, rinse and repeat.

Nobody knew how she felt, not even her husband knew. Only she did, and she didn't plan on telling anyone any time soon. Or never, actually. It might be one of the things she'll take to the grave so nobody would ever know.

But she couldn't exactly say such a thing yet. For all she knew, someone might know about it the next day, maybe in a few months or hours, or even years. She didn't know.

Della laid down on her side. Maybe it was about time to sleep; then again, she might not be able to sleep at all.

She had been having sleepless nights lately, so she wouldn't be too surprised if tonight was one of them.

She couldn't let herself dwell on something like this for too long. She had to move on at some point, but she wanted to know when. She wanted to know how long she'd be stuck on it.

Della had been feeling it for years now, so long that she couldn't exactly remember when she started having those feelings. She wanted to finally move on, to let it all go, but her heart wouldn't let her. It wouldn't leave her be, no matter how hard she tried.

It annoyed her to keep thinking about it.

She knew it would never happen, so she wanted to know when it would all pass. Not even being on the moon for ten years helped her case any. In fact, it made it worse the minute she came back.

It terribly destroyed her on the inside to keep it to herself. Not being able to speak it to anybody was eating her up, but she had to keep shut. She'd write it down, but she was afraid that someone might find it.

What snapped her out of her mind nearly made her jump. A knock came along when she was off, wandering in the thoughts in her head. She had a breath of relief that it was only a knock on the door.

She got up and opened the door. The person who knocked on it was none other than Donald himself, her twin brother.

"Oh, hey Donnie," Della greeted. "What are you doing here?"

"I thought I'd see if you, uh, wanted to watch a movie or something?" He offered. "I know you haven't been able to sleep too well, so I thought I might be able to help some."

Come to think of it, she hadn't been spending time with him like she did with her sons as of late. Now would be a good time to do so than never.

Though, she felt conflicted. Her mind said 'no', as she wanted to be alone for now, while her heart said 'go ahead, it won't kill you any' since she didn't at least spend a few hours with him at all those past couple of weeks.

Della wasn't doing much anyways, just laying there in bed being lost in her head, so she thought 'why not?' Besides, while spending time with her brother, it might actually help her try to sleep.

She could spend the entirety of tomorrow with him to make up for all of the lost time.

"Sure. I'm not really doing anything right now." She said.

She moved aside, letting him inside of her room. She had a TV in there and some movies she didn't touch yet, so Della thought it would be easier if they watched there instead of downstairs.

She turned the lights on, as those had been off since hours ago. They looked through whatever movies she had and went with whatever they were in the mood for.

Donald slid the movie into the DVD player and sat down. Della sat down on the bed beside him. She crossed her legs while Donald rested his arms on his legs.

As the movie began playing, Della stared at it blankly, as if she was looking off into space once more. Thirty-four minutes into the film, Donald noticed how she was staring at the TV. He waved his hand in front of her face.

She then blinked a few times and looked at him.

"Sorry, was I spacing out just now?" Della asked.

He nodded. "Yeah, you were."

"I'm sorry about that, Donald."

"It's fine, Del." He paused the movie. "Is there something bothering you? If there is, do you wanna talk about it?"

She shrugged. "I dunno. I guess I just miss Harold is all."

While that wasn't exactly a lie, her husband wasn't what she had been thinking of all night. Despite that, Donald believed she was telling the truth about what was on her mind, luckily for her.

"Well, we can see if he's free anytime soon." Donald said.

"Yeah, that would be nice." She told him.

This time, she tried her best not to space out as much as before. After the movie's done, she could lose herself in the depths of her mind all she wanted.

She just had to make sure she didn't worry Donald too much.

He pressed play on the movie. They both continued watching it as they were enjoying themselves. As they were nearly done with the movie, Della fell asleep right onto his shoulder.

Feeling this, Donald decided it was a good time to turn the movie off and get her to bed comfortably.

He moved some of the blankets, laid her down on the bed, and covered her with the blankets. He didn't want her to feel too cold as she was sleeping. She was wearing a sleeveless shirt, after all, so he didn't want her to wake up shivering.

He got up to leave when he swore he heard her mumble something in her sleep. He couldn't figure out what she said aside from 'love you'. He slightly chuckled hearing the mumbles.

She always spoke in her sleep, whether it made sense or not. It was always quiet so nobody was able to put together what she said unless they were close enough.

He never tried to bother with it. Whenever he did, he'd always accidentally wake her up from being so close to her. So, after the first few times, he didn't dare to try again.

Donald turned the TV off and the lights out. He then went back to the house boat to fall asleep there. While it wasn't much, it was great to spend some time with her again after all of these years.

* * *

She woke up yawning and stretching.

As she rubbed her eyes, she looked next to her as she smiled. It soon faded away, as the one she loved wasn't lying next to her. Of course he wasn't, much to her hope. It wasn't going to happen anytime at all, so she wondered why even hope for that.

She didn't know why she held on to what little hope she had, yet she did. Della supposed that part of her still believed that it could happen someday. She sighed, pondering on what the point of doing so was.

She saw that it was almost nine according to the clock next to her bed. Della wasn't sure if she wanted to stay in bed longer, or get up now. She then looked out the window; it looked like it was the best weather to be out in.

Thinking about it, she might as well stay in for a few more minutes. She didn't want to get out of bed yet. She wrapped herself in the blanket she had on her. Della felt too comfy to even sit up.

All she wanted to do was lie down.

As she buried herself within the warmth of her blankets, she closed her eyes. While staying up sounded good, sleeping a little more sounded a whole lot better.

Della tossed and turned her body, trying to get herself to be completely comfortable with her position again. She lied there for a few minutes, relaxing her mind and body.

Nothing appeared to be working for her to fall back to sleep. It seemed like her body wanted her to get up now instead of later.

She sat up and removed the blankets off of her body. Della removed some hair that was in her beak, not realizing that until now. She ran her fingers through her hair, brushing it with only her hand.

Afterwards, she out of bed and went to one of her drawers.

As she did so, she saw something going on outside the window. She saw that the kids, Huey, Dewey, Louie, and Webby, were spending some time with Donald. They were all having a fun time. Even though she wasn't able to hear it, she could tell they were laughing. Mostly Donald.

She had a small smile on her face as she looked down and through the drawers. She was glad they were all having fun at least.

But, it was about time to get ready for the day.

* * *

A/N: This Author's Note probably isn't needed or anything, but I feel better writing this before getting this posted and all. Hope you enjoyed reading this and, if you want to read the rest of the AN, go right ahead it doesn't really matter if you do or not.

I'm actually kinda nervous to post this, honestly. Don't get me wrong, I love sharing whatever I created, but I'm not sure how this'll go. The reason being is that I wanted to expand on a bit of subtext that I put in one of my other fanfics, which I highly doubt anybody even picked up on while reading it. If they did, then they definitely didn't say anything about it. Of course, I could've been direct with what's going on here, but I wanna keep it subtle and everything until what I think would be the best time to do so, even if I just did this.

I decided to call Huey, Dewey, and Louie's dad Harold for now because I have no idea on what to call him as we don't know his name yet, in case if anyone's wondering. I have a whole lot thought out for him, I'm just not exactly sure when to do any of that stuff since I do want to do something with him, but I'm not sure when and how. If you guys want to ask about any of this, you can go ahead and PM me if you want - I don't know.


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